Saturday, February 05, 2005

Hearts of Darkness

Or: Are Warlocks and Strong Mayors Taking Over Boca Raton?

Wow. What a week. I should have known as soon as the first Sprint fiasco of '05 hit on Monday that this week was going to be a little off. And by a little... I mean a lot.*

Many long stories short:

1.) Sprint will act all tough and turn off your phone, but if you yell (or, as in my case, get a friendly customer service representative), they will remove unnecessary charges without putting up any kind of fight whatsoever. In retrospect, that customer service representative was a pansy; I wish he would have let me argue a little more -- I was so ready to kick some over-the-phone ass.

2.) The Medill prophecy is coming true: punctuation can, in fact, make or break you in the journalistic world. Misplaced question mark? You're gone. (And for the record, that question mark after 'misplaced question mark' was not meant to represent a misplaced question mark.) It would be dangerous for me to elaborate any further.

3.) You know what's hilarious? Talking about how I was dumped for a Wiccan-vegan,** and how my ex-boyfriend is now a Warlock. Go ahead -- laugh it up. Everyone else has been (more than usual this week, I've noticed.) Thanks in advance for the friendly reminder that Valentine's Day is fast approaching. It's shaping up to be the best ever.

4.) Doing the Grind for three days in a row can make you feel great (especially when you spend half the warm-up laughing at Eric Nies and his anatomy lessons -- "hamstrings!") That great feeling can easily be negated by four vodka tonics on day 4.

5.) Violin-and-synthesizer duos playing the longest tango ever have no place in a tiny restaurant in which no meat is served.

* I've been doing that a lot lately -- you know, the thing I used to do where I'd say, "A, and by 'A'... I mean B." It used to be a little gem of trademark phraseology, but then I got over it for awhile. But it's appaarently making a comeback (I have no control, it seems), so never fear.

** For the record, that was five years ago, and yes, I was told at the time that I would look back on the whole bizzare scenario and laugh. Someday...